Thursday, August 27, 2009
after the night with them,i promise i won't take it too much anymore!
The night,is the night liyana,styler,lee mee,wai keong and new friend spent at............21..!!!!
hehe=) actually that's styler's idea..but good also laa..at least i can release out my stress and make me feel better eventually..hmm=) thanks!
We really enjoy the night!haha..but too sad cui cui didn't join us..sure because of ******..
the Ex..sms asking me some funny question..hmm..
is hard for me to throw that feeling toward you actually..but..
you end it what..whats more can i say???
first time i drink so many glasses of it..hmmp!!
but i'm sure i didn't drunk de..just..feel abit dizzy..haha!
still fresh..=) hor?? wait what wor???hahahaha..
hmm..but can't sleep well after that..feel like going to die..haha..nola..just feel tired and weak..hmm..
then my head ar..feel like have a big stone on my head..damn heavy headache..
at last..vomit!gosh..luckily i'm at home that time..hmm..
hate lo..stupid me..vomit inside the room tim..need to clean it..eawwww...how gross!!!!
how i wish someone will clean it for me..haha! how bad am i!hmm..
then returned to bed,turned here and there..the head still suffering=( vomit again..but this time clever jor..know how to go toilet..huhh!
yuan lai its so xin ku de..next time i don't want to drink so much dy..so suffering!not feel nice at all!
the next day 9am class ar!late woke up dy..and still feel weak and headache..wanna skip de actually..but..dear styler willing to wait me and come to my hse to fetch me wor..ahem..even i sick till wanna die i'll go also lo..so wei da!hahaha..thanks styler!
tonight actually ''final destination 4'' de..but haven't on wor..stupid!!hate!!!
so maybe change to other show lo..wow..wait what wor????hahahaha..
but of cuz i managed my time to study,sleep,eat,,and enjoy also laa..if not die lo..haha..
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
just now after class,i received a call from styler and she let me know that she are going to tesco..
hehe=) since i've thing to buy,so i just ''ok''!
haha!! with a rush..stupid liyana locked her door room without bring the key out! GOSH!!!
so i've to go to the office asking for the key and that bitchy still want me to return the key right after that! even i've told her i have important thing to do!!huuhh...
run here and there..and still need to ma fan my hsemate to open door for me..haiz..
and have to fine rm 2 somemore!!!! stupid!
after tesco-ing,went to return the bbq sets to chee chin..then dinner with styler and lee mee..=)
hmm..we met a new friend!haha..from utar de leh..nice to meet her=) so fast we became friend dy..haha..we're not scaring you la...hehe=)
tonight 21 leh..after study wanna relax abit mah=) tmr maybe 'final destination 4'..hmm..
hopefully lo..cuz really wanna watch!!!! new friend wanna go also leh..hope hope lo..hehe=)
but really busy with the final preparation leh..haiz..
but..still have to relax mah..lets chill..=) hahaha!!
ohya..i saw my romeo walking with other girl leh..hmm..i keep on spy on them just now..haha!funny!!! crazy too!!
but didn't holding hand leh..and chat just like normal friend..hmm=) hehehehe..
miss betty they all err..=( sorry for not dinner with you all for this few days..=(
it was a misunderstanding!
finally all cleared now=)
i feel much better now..hehe=)
i know is im too sensitive..keke=)
in fact,we are closer than last time=)hmm..
feel happy and appreciate it much!!
oh ya..last night so funny..
i went dinner with styler and cui cui..
styler want ghany,cui cui want seng yip!
haha..my god..standing there for half an hour..arguing there..hmm..
i'm as the middle person,can't say anything..haha..
finally..i came up with an idea..
''cui cui,you go seng yip da bao,then we go ghany,ok?''-lyn
''hmm..ya..good idea..等什么哦? fast laa..''-styler
''haiz..lek lo lek lo lek lo..later ghany halau me go,i'll kill you ar!''-cui cui
hahaha..what la..like that also want to argue..hmm..but cui cui don't want ghany have reason de..hehe..
but hor,me and styler never face that kind of problem..
so conclusion is..FACE PROBLEM laa..cui cui..haha!!!
hate hate hate!!!
so stress this few days..hmmp!!
bust preparing for the final..
i hate mc!!others still ok..i hard to understand mc..
but no matter how,i still have to study err..hmm..
so sad..have to cancel all the plans..
choose to study at home instead of attending the classes which i feel my brain still empty even after listening to the lecturer for two hours..
*i hope can go stadium this sunday,for the merdeka celebration..hmm..i really wanna go..but don't know can anot..every year i wish to go..but...
every year failed..haiz..
and i hope you can go with me,but feel like impossible de..hmm..cui cui they all seems like don't want to go also=(
so just fine ler..hmm=)
Monday, August 24, 2009
but just can't figure it out.
I laugh,i smile,i play..
but it is all fake!
There are something to be said,
but it seems no time to make it all clear.
I behave the same,i keep quiet..
but doesn't mean i'm nothing!
There are something that make me wonder,
but till now i just can't get any hints.
I acted normal,I carry on my days..
but it is suffering at all of the time!
I'm so tired to be like this..
who can understand me??
Saturday, August 22, 2009
can anyone tell me??
i'm sad,it's so hurtful..
can anyone help me??
i need you..but why you seems like don't care me anymore??
i miss those time you called me,sms me..
for no reason..just to chat with me..
hmmm..you seems like busy nowadays..
but i still need you,do you know that??
please spend some of your time with me,and i can spend my time with you too,
Friday, August 21, 2009
cuz i really miss you soo much!
chat alot,laughed and jokes..
make me feel wanna stop the time.
but yet i have no power to do so,
at last we have to stay away after these nice moment.
But just don't know why feel like crying.
the happiness had changed to sadness.
The feeling are become stronger and stronger,
that i don't even understand it.
You make me feel sad,
because i can see through your eyes,
there is nothing gonna change it.
We will still be the same,
but at sometime,i feel different..
you had changed!
but yet i pray and wish for non stop.
still,don't have any sign i get,
that's make me dissapointed and sad.
You care me,make me laugh make me happy,
make me more suffer actually.
why must it be like this?
i should be happy meeting you?or should regret?
i wonder there are chance for me?and for us?
no confidence anymore,just left dream.
DEar god,please do not treat me like this.
i really suffer and hurt.
so i'll still hoping..
fun!!!really really fun!!eventhough have to change our location cuz of the heavy rain..hehe=)
but still we enjoyed ourselves sooo much!!!
feel happy=) really happy!!!haha..
but forgot to take photos err..haiz..cuz no one holding camera..haha..how ke xi ohh=(
hmm..although there are something make me dulan..but,..nvm lo..
as long they happy jiu hao..i'm ok with that=)hehe..
overall..fun!!!very happy..i love you all!!!!trust me=)
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
hmm..and excited for the BBQ tomorrow=) tonight they coming to my hse to marinate the chicken wings..yeah!!!
and..i'm happy to talk with you last night=)hehe..happy!!!! you promised to call me back but you didn't do so de..haiz..but anyway..hope to see you soon ya!
erm..happy just now met my 'remeo'..hahahaha...but still the same..nothing happen le..hehe..
happy la today!!
but there are something spoilt my mood also=( lazy to talk about it..haiz..=( just fine laa..
wanna rest now..=)
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
hmm..just now we went to tesco..to buy those things for our BBQ..
happy..fun..hehe=) but abit angry lo..some of them dun1 pay me 1st..haiz..i no money d lo..
hehe=) but is ok..as long as all of us happy..hmm=)
me,benjamin,styler,davide,cui cui and chow chow went to tesco together=)
shopping like auntie!!haha..bought those stuff for BBQ de..wow..so excited lo!!
but we need to study our IT in advance lo..cuz thursday night is the BBQ day..hmm..
and starting on yesterday,i promised myself to sleep or be at home before 11pm every night..hehe=) today i did it!! that's the secret for beauty-according to lee mee!!hahaha..nice to chat with you yesterday=)
but styler very naughty,last night don't allowed me to go back after the yum cha session.haha..but fine,still manage to reach home at 11.30pm..late for half an hour! lol
didn't eat dinner with betty they all..eat with styler,cui cui and neo..haha!!damn full but long to wait for our foods..suddenly feel lazy to layan 'her'..never thought i have a friend like 'her'..
hmm..it's time to study lo..hehe=) and i really pray that you can join us!!!=)
Monday, August 17, 2009
hmm..but nvm..it still will on..like styler said,it's enough for us to join it..after cancel their names..we still have about 11-12 people joining..
but of cuz more people to join will be more fun,but maybe good also la..cuz our budget not really high..then no need to prepare so much of foods..hehe=)
I'm looking forward to it=) we all feel so excited!!haha..and..i hope you can join lo..haiz..really hope you can join!!!hehe..
tomorrow we are going to tesco to buy all the things..wanna prepare it well..don't want last minutes..hmm..yeah!!!!! enjoy for the last time before looking forward for the final exam!!
it will be fun hopefully..and pray to dear god for not giving rain for that night=) please..do give us chance to enjoy ourselves ya..please...
Thursday, August 13, 2009
who's more important?
to me,is family..really!(100%) i'm sure..
because based on what i observed and discovered that,
a friend.. will come to you just when you're in a good condition..just when you're in laughter..just when your pocket full with money and with 'alot of lines' in your small brain.
haiz..that's the fact!but i strongly agreed that not all of them is like that.
some of them still will care foe you just you won't know either is really sincere from their heart or just by the surface.=)
like how i feel now.I was sick for these few days,and i just see doctor just now in the morning.
hmm..it is just a normal fever.But 90% of getting H1N1..but of cuz he gave me alot of medicine to prevent and do asked me to take extra cares.well..i think is nothing serious,hopefully..cuz just the symptoms i have a likely to the symptom of H1N1..
but no worries,doctor said not confirm 100%!!!haha..god bless me and also dad.
i told them just now about my condition,they're ok..but seems like SOME of them are avoiding me.scare of me..=(
well..i understand la..if me,i'll avoid to be so close with a suspected person for getting H1N1 too la..hehe=)
but not family members,especially my mom..they never feel scare of me or trying to avoid from me!but instead of avoiding,they will care and care and care and care and care you more.And just worrying about you!! just like the world going to stop turning,or just like the sun going to fall on them.
So from here,i can make a simple conclusion and interpretation!hahaha..
that's is..no matter how trouble are you in,our family will never left you behide..they won't leave you to cry alone with yourself.
Friends, are important in our life,ya!i simply can't deny it..but family,definately are more precious element in our whole long life!!
"other things may change us,but we start and end with family"
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
yesterday we just sleep for few hours..hmm..
stay awake to study the MC..haha..so funny..after back from shapo's hse,i went for walk with betty.
Since i couldn't sleep cuz i already took a nap in the evening,i called styler and asked where is she.Yuan lai she at cui cui's hse to study together..hehe=)
i went there..study and gossiping at the same time.
Suddenly cui cui comes up with an idea to go out study under the road-light.haha!!
thought it was a joke at first,but end up really we did it!!about 1 hour later,we changed our 'study location' at dataran!damn qi xin lo actually..haha..
we pretend to be a ghost and wave our hand to the pass-by people..but people ignore us..haha!
We studied at dataran..then i told them about my dream that couldn't achieve no matter how hard i try.hehe=) then we shared some of the secret..gossiping!and also do some planning for the BBQ.getting so excited ya!sure fun!!!!
I'm happy..cuz sitting at the dataran there..looking up to the sky and counting the stars..how nice the sky full of shining stars..i love it much!!!
about 5am only we back to cui cui's hse..hehe=)the next day,today.I not feeling well ler..my bad anyway..hehe=)
actually few days ago i already feel not really well..having cought and flu ady.Ms diong and betty asked me to see doctor..haha!!and just now i went jog with ccm,nick and ah yan with mask covering.hmm..
i thought after jog i'll feel fresh de..but actually not..now i even feel dizzy and sleepy..haha!and hungry also=(
where is my dinner???=( haiz..i think i really should consult a doctor..hmm..but hopefully just a normal sick la..won't be H1N1 la..haha!!
finally she willing to share everything with me.Actually i know she still sad about it..but no matter how,have to stay strong and move on.
i really understand how she feel.cuz i've been in her situation before.
pity her.She was a very nice person.Why she treated like that?i don't understand lo..haiz..
while she dropping her tears,automatically mine drop too..
make me recall of you.
but as how i comfort her just now..i have to make sure i can do it too!
cheer up lee mee..we'll love you forever k?
not to worries=)
liyana,you have to be ok too.you're strong..never turn to backward.
Monday, August 10, 2009
i can feel that you're sad,
i can feel that you have a lot of things to think about that make you unhappy.
This few days i really feel you're so weird.
Something that you're confusing about.
Something that make yourself uncomfortable with.
I can see it through your eyes.
you said you're alright,but deep inside your heart,you really need comfort.
You're not ok at all!!i know!!
yea..finally just now you told me that you feel helpless..
hmm..actually i knew it since we chat last time.
I can feel something wrong with you when you`re staring at me..
your eyes contact are totally different,i know it!!
stop hiding please..i'm always with you..
always free for you,don't worry.
i'm sad seeing you like this..cheer up k?
anything need my help,i'll try to lend you my hands..
and also my ears..
please don't make me worry about you..i really care of you!trust me..
you'll never alone,you still ME!!=)
Like me,i always think that i likes pink,
but actually not.
I suddenly realized that..quite alot of my stuff are in blue..
my pencil case,my bedsheet,my blanket,and quite alot of my clothes are in blue..
hmmm..izit because doraemon are blue??hahaha!!
and now i feel that i started to like green!!haha..same with styler=)
hmm..it's really weird.
Sometime we may always said that we like or love something so much!!
but actually in the heart,we actually like and love other thing even more!!
haiz..why it so complicated?why our life so complicated???
sometime even just a small matter,will make us confuse and effect our future.
And I,always don't let go all the memories that we had together..
i still staying in the world that we made up together,
eventhough we reached the end path.
Always just with a simple but strong reason,that is,i still very love you!
but i started to try understand myself,i try to follow my true heart..
and i realized that,actually the 'loves' toward you already gone.Because i know your heart no longer with me,so why should i be so unfair and cruel to myself for continue loving you.
Maybe inside my heart already have other better peason than you,
I'm sorry..i'm sorry for the promises i had made to love you forever.
but the memories with you will always stay in my heart,trust me!
i hope same come to you.I believe that you already forget about me,anyway.haha!
For now,someone already stay in my heart,someone that already touches my heart and my soul as well.
I do really love that someone.I miss you,someone.I miss you so much!!!
Sunday, August 09, 2009
Sick of it la!!!!
why so hard for me to understand it??
woke up at 12.30pm while cui cui still piggy-ing.
it's time to open MC TEXT BOOK again!!!
hate it hate it!!!
Cui cui more rajin than me=)
i studied half way then on the 'heart of fancing' again=0
going out for dinner now..
tonight plan to cover the chapters going to be tested on next tuesday.
i think tonight no dates,so i will stay at home!hehe=)
nothing special today,
what a boring day!!
haiz..so fast the day end=(
i still missing you like hell,wanna meet you soon!
ohya!!but i'm happy!finally i've found my 'thing' back..haha!!
That 'thing' really so precious for me,
eventhough,we've reached the end.
But it still important for me and simply can't let it go^.^
Saturday, August 08, 2009
that's what we plan to do!
we didn't go back ipoh this weekend
cui cui(my future roommate)hehe=) alone,me as well.
so i've decided to stay with her for this two days since celine dion back hometown dy.
sleep at 2am last night,woke up at 2pm today!!
after bathing,time for lunch!
enjoy the moment cui cui share her unhappy thing with me!
means i'm the one can be trusted!
reached her home,started to study..
she took a nap,i online with my babe,
continue to study,then she cooked dinner for me!
gossiping after that!laughed alot!
mentioned some sensitive issue,but nice to chat about.
Our MC text book still on the table,
make me feel so sick!
Next tuesday going to have test 2,
but i still blogging now^.^
miss my dear..waiting for his sms..=(
now planning to have a BBQ on 28th,hope all of you can join!
no excuses!!participation is compulsary=)!!
wanna take a bath now,tonight will be study!study!and study!!
hmm..wondering 'the plan' for next friday on or not..we are going to @$#%%##@..
really wanna go,cuz can meet my dear=)
starting on now onward mylife gonna be a hectic life,
busy for the preparation for final exam!gosh!!
hate it!!can't enjoy anymore!!=(
haiz..miss you all much!!faster come back here..wanna meet you all ler=(
Going back ipoh next weekend..can meet my beloved family=) wanna bake some cakes and cookies with mom=)YEAH!!!=)
lastly,i pray for baby recovery=)
Friday, August 07, 2009
1.my lovely jie jie..mimi=)
2.benjamin and me=)nice friend=)
3.traffic light!davide,me and susan
4.my emo partner-lewis koh
5.kelvin and me..always bully me=(
6.number cui cui!!haha=)
7.styler and me posing in front of the mirror!!
8.they`re my bao bei!!i love them much!!miss you all=)
9.curi snap them from the back!!my beloved sis and bro..
10.my class rap-lee mee..haha..我们感情没变!!hehe=)
still have alot of nice photos i took with you all,my dear..some of it i haven't upload..next time k?hehe=)love you all..muackss!!
as usually..we eyes-connecting and contacting again!!haha..
but don't know why i don't have the courage to give him a smile like how i`ve planned to do it!haha..
i'm sure that's nothing..but i just feel happy when see him..weird right?
didn't go back ipoh this weekend..stay here to do some revision=) eventhough i know will be boring here..but is okay=) susan here..i can have meals together with her..she need someone to accompany her also anyway..haha!
Thursday, August 06, 2009
To all my dear..i miss you all so much!!the self-loving gang..i really miss you all=(
i just see our photos that we taken last time..hmm..really make me feel wanna cry=( miss those times huh? nicole..i wanna share alot of things with you=( that saturday i thought we can meet..haiz..really dissapointed huh? and actually i wanna join you all to IRC for lunch..but i got no transport to there..and i got plan with my family too=( so sad..=(
I'm going to have a BBQ here..with my new friends here..suddenly miss the time we organized BBQ..parties together before..when you all think we can meet up ya?i not go back ipoh every week..and you all still have school activities..haiz..
so long we didnt meet ya..nicole at kl..and going Australia soon!haiz..i really wish to meet you all..so long time we didnt laugh together..only you all can make me forget about everything..!!i'm so sad now..stress with my life..
i need you all to be with me=( i miss you all so much!!!do you all miss me too?or forget about me ady?haiz..
really hope you all can join the BBQ that im going to held..
you know why?hehe=)cuz i discovered something..
erm..sometimes,when we really hope for something,it won't be easy to comes true;but sometimes when we don't hope for it..it sure will comes true..and the result sometimes is totally better than what we expected!great right?yup..that's life..
i keep hoping for it..but end up get frustrated and dissapointed..
hmm..but sometimes,when i don't hope for it..not to think about it anymore..sure it will happens..hehe=)
so now..i`ve stop hoping..stop thinking for too much!!if that is mine..it won't run away one..hehe=)no matter how still i manage to get it one day=)
Wednesday, August 05, 2009
why?it's so unfair!!!
sometime really get frustrated!dissapointed..sad..hurt!!
i hate to be like this..i'm no longer like last time..everything i wish to have sure i can get..even how impossible it is..
but now even a simple thing..i have to go through so much of hurt and pain then only can get some of it..
why?really unfair!!i started to hate myself..i no longer liyana that have possitive thinking and full of confidences..i'm not anymore..
is all because of you!!!!i tried to hate you,but i can't..i just hate myself even more!!!for being fooled by you!!
and become an idiot to love you..
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
I promised to eat with you all but every night i didn't fulfill it..sorry~~
this few days i quite busy with my own stuff..i miss you all so much..
we less talk..less yum cha together already..so sad=(
and actually i wanna move to betty's house there..but really troublesome..and there much more expensive..and after a few months..you will be graduate adi..then i'll be alone there also..
haiz..i'm so sorry my dear sis!sorry..really sorry..
hmm..i have to spend more times with them now..so long i didn't hang out with them and to have a nice chit chat..a lot of stories i wanna share with you all..and i'm sure you all have stories for me too.right?too bad shapo no longer stay with me..if not we wont be like this le..
i really miss you all..love ya!muackss..=)
your face are still fresh in my mind..i cant forget the eyes contact..hmm..where have you been?i hope to see you again..hehe=)
To another you..why you always sms me during my sleeping time?haha..then when i'm free you never reply my msg..hmmp!!i dont know why..suddenly miss you so much!!last night i really need your comfort..but you busy..sigh~~
To you.....what is done is done..you've made the decision,and nothing gonna change it again..i wont let you to hurt me again..this is the last time k?you go for your own dream..and so do i..
everything settled now..and i hope you'll never regret it..we're still friend..if thats what you wanting for..=)
im too tired to care it for too much..i get nothing at the end..
ya,we are still friend..but i don't think you still need me anyway..haha..well,you have a better friends already..hmm..i think this is the time for me to stay away from you..i think im not a good friend for you..but i'll still care and remember you,for sure..i'll always pray for you=) if you're in trouble..i'll try to help,i'll find the way..ok?not to worry..=)
i wanna study hard in my studies now..should cut down the plan to shopping..play..yum cha..enjoy..hehe=) i'll try my very best to achieve a exellent result in my final exam..hmm..that's what on my mind now..
just fine la..if i continue to think about it..i'll get hurt again..why not i choose to have a better life,right?
i still have my family standing with me..hmm..i still have nice sister,betty..hehe=)i still have my fellow coursemates and close friends..cui cui,styler,lee mee and so on..i still have nic and the gang~~
and i believe i still have many people care for me..and still need me..and still will treat me as human with feeling,right?i should be thanksful=) i believe i can be a better person..
i get hurt,at least i can learn something from it..at the same time..it will make me strong..ya..that's what i want..
cheer up..i'm ok..will be ok soon!!!haha..
i'll make myself busy to forget about everything that make me so sick!
final exam coming soon..i'll start doing revisions..hmm..and i'll busy with the dance and yoga class soon..hehe=) but i'm sure i'll enjoy it!!cuz i really wanna learn yoga..hmm..finally have the chance=)yahoo!!!
why must you treat me like this?
i dont know what should i do..find who to talk to..???
i just want to hate you!!!but i cant..i dont know why..
i really hate you hate you hate you!!!!!!!!!!!!why?i tried my best..why you leave me again??enough is enough..please do not hurt me again..i want a better tomorrow..a better life..your friends are more important than me..then go to them..since you dont need me,dont ever find me again..can you?you said you still will care me..arey ou sure you can do it???
u know what??i wont regret it..but i`ll make sure that you`ll regret it!!!i hate you so much!!!and i`ll continue to hate you..i hate you for treating me like this!!!!i hate you do you know that???
Sunday, August 02, 2009
you are always turn up in front of me..and your eyes will start connecting and contacting with my eyes..feel so different..
hmm..am i thinking too much??no i dont think so..
cuz i was totally different..
but im sure it is nohing at all..i just want to know who are you..
cuz since than..my mind are conquer by you..
so i dont want to think for too much..enough just to remember who are you actually..hehe=)
hope to see you tomorrow..and i've decided to smile with you first..=)because i think is ok to smile even to stranger..cuz it cost nothing=)
i've been waiting for you..
bringing the hopes you will appear..
but none of it come true..=(
i tried,i prayed,i wished..
but all useless..
whats more can i say?or whats more i can do?
continue hoping?or give up?
im trying to think positively..
feel abit relax and calm after that..
i just dont want to see too far away..
cuz it will make me more suffer..
why dont i just try to hope..nothing will be less by putting hopes,right?=)
so i've decided..to wait for you=)