Sunday, January 31, 2010

after exam:)

This is what we did after the final^^ fun=)we went for steamboat in ipoh and meet up with suezhen and sam for drink drink at..somewhere^^ hees=) happy moment but sad too.hmm..cuz our kenny is leaving us that night.hmm.
all the girls=)oppss..where is kitty??Lol
darling,kenny and kitty so so busy=) yummy=)
crazy gang^^ davide,styler,lee mee,burger and cui cui=) and styler=)

on saturday night,styler,davide,darling and me went for a movie=) nice show=) - wu hu=) haha..later on,went voodoo^^ Reach kampar quite late.had some chat for awhile.and bye bye..see you guys on next sem.
sob.i'm gonna miss them so much!

Friday, January 29, 2010

A to Z from someone:)

Q and A:)
A-Available?: not available.
B-birthday on?: 28th of july.
C-crushing on?: it's a secret =x
D-Drunk before?: Yes,few times:)
E-easiest person to talk to? : urm.darling^^
F-favorite song?: err.latest,russian roulette by rihanna:)
G-gummy bears or gummy worms? : Bears!
H-had sex before?: what kind of question is this huh?
I-in love with?: Darling^^
J-jusco or parade u prefer? : jusco:)
K-killed someone before? : nope.killing myself :x
L-longest car ride?: urm..4-5 hours i thk.
M-missing someone right now?: yes.
N-number of sibling?: 3
O-one wish.: make me pass my exam please^^
P-person that you wish to kill?: M L
Q-quiet or noisy are you?: quiet or noisy? Lol
R-reason to smile?: Be with them!
S-sick of?: M L!!!!!!!
T-thing that you never ever touch?: drug.
U-underwear brand and colour: C.K. blue in colour.^^
V-vegetable(s): err...depends.
W-wish to do right now : Kill that bitch!
X-x-ray u did before?: nope.
Y-Yellow are the symbol of?: ?? sex? haha.
Z-zany you are?: my friend said i am:)
haha..can i add on? for H-hate? M L,fakers and destroyers. W-wishes: wish that he'll listen to me^^and forever with me^^


Sad after he told me that he forgotten the first day we get to know each other:(
but he still remember that 'she' being so nice to him.
on the same day.
what..i'm nice to you on that day too!
i still remember the topics that we chat about.
the funny thing we laughed together.
but did you?
maybe i'm not attractive enough that can make him remember.
just fine:(
'she' just seems perfect in your eyes.
make me hate her more right now!

Thursday, January 28, 2010


Before and after:)
Before i'm with him,
i was free to enjoy every plans with buddies.
but now,of cause i have to mind him alot!:) and get his permission.
Before i'm with him,
i do things alone.
but now everything seems to divide into two:)
Before i'm with him,
i only mind my own business.
but now i have to care and mind his too:)
Before i'm with him,
my time spend more with buddies.
but now i have to put more attention to him:)
Before i'm with him,
i can just see styler and davide holding hand.
but now i can even hug him.=)
Before i'm with him,
i take care of myself.
but now i have to take care of him as well:)
Before i'm with him,
my mind is free.
but now every second every minute of the day my mind busy thinking of him.
Before i'm with him,
i buy thing only for me.
but now i buy for him as well.
Before i'm with him,
i sleep on the whole bed,
but now have to share half with him:)
Before i'm with him,
i don't really share thing with people.
but now there are no secret between us two.
Before i'm with him,
i was jealous of other couples.
but now others jealous of me and him:)
Before i'm with him,
i don't like black and white.
but now i love it because he love it:)
Before i'm with him,
i don't mind what others think of me.
but now i mind what he think of me because i just want to be perfect in his heart:)
Before i'm with him,
i scare to walk alone in the dark,
but now i don't have to feel so because he holding my hand all the way:)
Before i'm with him.
my blog post is just about myself.
but now most of the post is about me and him:)
Before i'm with him,
my days doesn't as cheerful as now.
but now my days really cheerful and fun!
Before i'm with him,
i don't really appreciate the times,
but now every second is just like a gold that gonna waste if not to be spend together.
Before i'm with him,
i'm got my own freedom.
but now no more:) *it's good actually*
changes fall on me after i'm with him.
and i really appreciate it:)
Yesterday darling said something that.surprising me.quite.
darling: hey,just now in the exam hall,i see all the girls around me.i wonder why i'll choose you instead of them.hmm.then its remind me to what you've done toward me.your kindness and your effort,especially on my birthday that time.i really really really appreciate you:)
me: =) your birthday?what did i've done?
darling: urm..everything.=)
me: sweet:)
darling: But only that moment laa..hahaha.
me:== aiyer,only that moment you feel that you appreciate me?you so bad.=(
darling and me: hahahahaahahaha.....

A kind of sick

A kind of sick.
yes,that kind.
really suck.
like hell.
No,i'm not really down just because of that matter.
but just,disappointed.maybe.
Just a little mistake,the goodness and fun memories just fade away.
yea,sometime we tend to forget how to appreciate others.
even if the people appreciate you so much.damn much!
just a little mistake that the people done,
tend to be a serious case to us.
put the blame all around.
never try to find the solution.
since the mind of thinking of theirs are totally different with smart people.
Where are their brain huh?
always think of silly silly thing.
never grow up.
my god.
please ohh..
But i know the problem is not from me.
because i get full support and love from them here:)
damn much!
what's the problem of theirs actually??
what is done is done,anyway.
there is no button to click to the past,
even if there are any,
stop hoping that i'll click it on.
my day now not with fake happiness.
i tell you first,
is really really fuckin happy and cheers!!!
so now,damn all of you! my previous so-call best friend.
thanks for get lost from my life.
i'm not regret for any.
Just feel myself so dumb for care and love you all so much.
and being so kind to let you all step on to.

Sunday, January 24, 2010


When i got nothing to do.I really don't do anything. fei^^
woke up at..urm.around 2pm.right?hmm.the call from dear wing ann woke me up:)
urmm..bathe..facebook..went for so-called breakfast with styler and darling.
naughty thing we did just now.*secret*
went tesco later on.get some food for the son:)
hmm.the day just passed like this.
well..after the paper.sem break.
i'm gonna mad missing you like crazy,for sure:)
darling^^ we have been walking for 1 month and 24 days.yes,around that.
valentine can't celebrate together:( how sad.
same comes to styler and davide.and other couples as well.
last night we argue again:( hmm..not really hope to talk about it anymore.
but then i'm very very sure that he is loving me much.
Sorry for the nonsense thing i had said to you last night ya.
Love you:)
anyway,the sem break won't take too long.
i guess.
just..urm..around..2-3 weeks maybe.
I'll miss you for very sure:)
hees:) wheeeeeeeee.....

Saturday, January 23, 2010


Yeah.finally i can update my precious blog:) haha.
since the line treat me so nice now:)
no idea what to blog about.
but the only thing is.I feel more relax now:)
urm..let's talk about darling first:)
last few night he turned aggressive.haha..
i think maybe he stress of studying the mc and drama.i guess.
he hit me with the pillow.and try to make me fall from the chair.
he also kicked and slapped me. *not really la*
I was doing my revision at that time and i was like,wow..what is wrong with you?
haha.but of cause i did layan him and fight with him too!
my knee became 'blue black' after knocked with the bed.
hmm..about brownie now:)
i'm thinking where to keep him for the sem break.
mom doesn't allow me to bring him back.*sigh*
darling will bring him back but yet i feel unhappy to trouble him.
he so so so cute you know?haha..
love him much.
i'm gonna train him to say : right! wheeeeee! yeepeee..circus! poop in his hand poop in his hand! incoming!....hahahaha..* Darling will understand what is that,and he was like,totally fuckedup whenever i says that.
kampar life,not to say boring la.
cuz i've found a group of people that i can hang out with:)
enjoy it much!:)
two more papers to go.
and merdeka!
hahaha..after get the result more 'merdeka' *opposite*
haha.anyway.don't wanna think so much first:)
and and and..i hate comparison.^^
so please.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Life is not simple

Life is not simple.
and never be simple.
but that's life:)
what to do.
facing many kind of problem,
right now.
and so many thing to worry about.
stress man!
exam stuff,family,friends and also relationship.
and my little son:)
everything seems like no solution to solve.
feel wanna to give up.
but i know i'll regret it one day.
fuck my life!
dear said i've changed.
hmm.don't know.
i've changed?i was like.umm.really??or it's the real me?
don't any idea of changing. is me.
but they said so too.
changed to mad.Did i?
yes,i think i am:) Lol
Tomorrow paper.Fuck off la!
damn hard.=(
hopefully everything gonna be fine.
Dear was angry with me now.
because of something that i admitted is my fault.
I accidentally talked with him with high tone.
my son growing up now.haha.
yes.should say he's grown up:) and quite naughty.
still argue with them about the make up bitch.
fake thing she is!
who cares anyway?
The real thing will cover the fake thing,eventually.
so,i'm gonna to cheers my fuckin life:)

Sunday, January 17, 2010


I was not sure if i was dreaming,but not until i feel your touches and whenever i feel your lips on mine:) Actually i don't even know how to describe what i feel and you know what?I do feel so so so proud to be yours:) *seriously* I always wonder why you will choose me.Because i totally understand that i'm not your cup of tea.and i know i'm not the best for you.Honestly,i do feel jealous whenever you talk about others esp knew it:)hmm.not that i don't trust you,is just.i don't have any confidence.but not until l know *something* from *someone* haha.I really feel so touch and warm after i've found it out:) Thanks dear:) And sorry that i can't be the type you want.But i'll try.well,I am trying:)But seriously it'll takes time.and i hope that you can wait for the result.

phew.God.I'm totally out of my mind.I never change myself just for someone else.But this time,yes. NO,he never request for it.I do it for my ownself actually:)I just..wanna be the best for him:) Make him happy and proud to have me:)

I love the feel whenever you touch me,hug me and kiss me and even when you're holding me hand.The moment is just like..*undescribeable* haha! Maybe for you is just a normal actions for a pairs.But to me,it was totally special and precious that i can't effort to lose it:)

I don't mind if to harm myself.*I'm mad* :) It's totally worth for,and i never regret to have you in my life.Yup,maybe other people might thinks that..huh?what are you doing?is that worth?for what?and bla bla bla..You know..i don't even give a fuckin care.I don't mind what people might feel or think but i really mind if you mind about what others might think.LOL *complicated* haha!
hmm.Actually you do give me strength and encourage me to make myself to be better.Even by some hurtful words.Lol okay:) i know it:) hees. But i love whenever you tease me or 'bully' me.You're the expert. kaka! hmm.

Just fine.i promise not to tease you by using HER. Because now i really know that your heart are belongs to me.and forever be mine:)
oh! Am i still dreaming?Lol Nah..I'm not.hees:)
Hmm..but funny thing here.Huh?why i will fall in love to him?haha.Well,i still feel that i was dreaming for too much! Hmm.You know when you're falling in love,is when you can't fall asleep and do anything in peace mind,because reality finally better than your dreams:)

Saturday, January 16, 2010


Freakin no mood right now.headache since just now and i just can't do anything to make it better.don't know why feel so unhappy and angry:( everything happens around me really pissed me off.oh my*
since i got nothing to do.i simply click on people's blogs and trying get to get me update with the news of others.haha.Lol

ohmygod* i viewed her blog.F.O! i read it and make me feel to vomit what i've eaten just now.and i tried to leave comment on her post without signing in my identity.but failed.just..fine.* it's so so so fake of her!can't stand her.*mygod mygod.pls.i don't want to be bad.haha.* the post of her is totally want to showing off but yet she denied it.*gosh*

recently,many many weird species of people appear in my life and totally blocking my life!what god.
hmm.actually quite funny.i don't know why i dislike her so much.of cuz not just because of him,but the feel already exist since the day i met her.with full of make up.that's so-called pretty.and always gets warm welcomes from others.*this is not jealousy,but people with eyes and mind will agree with me* support*^^( like like like sistas!!) haha! i know who supporting me^^

hm.fine.don't want to comment much.just fine.later on people will feel it was a jealousy.haha!but nothing to be jealous of nothing just fakes.^^
**hiding oneself just can't bring her/him to anywhere:)
arrghhhh...freakin bad mood!!!


Finally done with my two papers:)okay,and hope i can score it:)hees.Damn tired and i got a bad headache due to lacking of sleep.last night join the last minutes revision at cui's hse together with styler and davide.haha!miss the moment we used to be like that last sem:)gossip about m****.fun!luckily darling not who cares?even if darling there.nothing gonna stop us to gossiping:)
he just cut his hair! how cute.^^hahaha.looks like small kid.i love it.but he doesn't like it.weird.
he skipped his lunch,i got to cook maggie for him.:)yea.the task have been completed.kaka.nice maggie:)ummm..
hmm.that's all for now:)eyes feel so so so tired.wanna take a nap:)
sis and mom,enjoy tmr's shopping trip ya.sad that i can't join:(
nvm.let's cheers:):)

Friday, January 15, 2010

a story of me & him

the first time i saw him,he was just an ordinary guy to me.and we never realized each other since we're not in the same class at that time.Every time we bump into each other,don't even 'hi' or give a smile.Until one day,we got chance to talk and laugh together,i feel that he's actually a smart and funny:)since then,we acknowledge and smile with each other whenever got the chance to meet.hees.Until one day in lecture hall,he asked for my number and yea,we exchanged!but the number just saved in the phone book,never use since got nothing to chat
This sem,i got to know that he's in the same class with me:) feel nothing,just glad that at least i have someone that i can close with since my gang entering chinese class.we started to contact through the sms,msn and even went for lunch or dinner together.people started to wondering about me and him til i feel so worried if he mind.Cui cui even predicted that he will become my future boyfriend and wow,she's right! haha.but..the development not that fast:) we walk to college together and he willing to wait for me even when i'm late:) in class,we sit together but didn't talk much.i mean,about other topic except the homework.but later on,the feel to understand him more started to exist in me and i just don't know why:)and..
emm..until one night.received his msg asking me about the feeling,i was like.oh my god.he's asking me that...haha.but at that time.i just told him that the feeling toward him just as a friend:) and he did told me the feeling of his toward me is more than a friend.i was happy,of cause.starting on the moment onward,every minutes of everyday my mind is totally thinking of him.oh my god.Styler started to ask me many things about me and him.:) and..i realized that i've been fall to him.well..after some times,i feel that it's time to tell him my true feeling toward him:)after the kl trip,the feel are much more stronger.and and and..we become a couple:)yea..till now:) of cause we did quarrel for some time,but well,thanks god that we manage to face it well.hees:) pls to god to make us strong til the end^^
and i just love him and enjoy every moment that we spend together:)
actually many many more i wish to share.but he was like.wah..what u blog about?so long??haha.and i do suddenly feel tired after hear he said that.really quite a long blog.heehes:)going to take a nap now:)
cheers your life!

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Line yang cacat!

i can blogging now:)
Line really cacat for this few days.
final started today.
started with english paper=)
Okay=) but not really enough time for the essay.
Fine^^ its over^^
feel closer with darling now=)
no more quarrel between us two:)
Thanks god:)
I just feel happy whenever with him.
last two nights,i couldn't sleep due to the med i've taken.
So decided to study.LOL
See his sleeping face.
*how cute*
but i wasn't so bad to snap it as how he did it on me=)
He's the one i care for most,i concern and i love:)
Kitty sister not feeling well.=(
*get well soon! sister*
and lastly..
Good luck for the rest of the war!!
To all of us yea.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

No title for this^^

Back kampar last night.
actually quite surprising me when received dad's sms.
that he worried about my safety time being,so decided to send me back=)
Mom bought me a new bedsheet!
haha..damn nice=)
love it..darling love it too!
Happy to see him=)
but darling is sick=(
*get well soon!*
My mirror broken=(
cuz of the strong wind just now.
luckily still have darling's big mirror:)
but just now when i stick doraemon on it,
darling said he will stick that PEOPLE pic on it to cover!
hmmp! hurting me=( cuz i hate her!!!!
Final coming...
but still relaxing.
don't know when only get the mood to study.
love you darling^^
get well soon^^

Saturday, January 09, 2010

In Love on outing^^

happy today:)
but miss darling so much^^
Just now received a "i love you'' msg from him.
first sweet=)
Went shopping with mom,sis and bro..
tired but fun!
Thanks mom for the shopping trip=)
And glad that she so so so kind for this and that=)
Actually will do 'ice' with kelvin,leong,nic,baby and sarah.
but kelvin's mom scolded us for using the machine.
Lol.Nvm^^ Nicole also not very free.
We wait for a very very very special day only can use it and ice-making together!
haha! err..let's do in July k? *what we discussed just now*
Liyana's birthday. kakaka!
tomorrow going back kampar.
Stress of studying come again.
miss you darling^^

Friday, January 08, 2010

I.MISS.YOU.LIKE.CRAZY. long never listen to it.
In car just now i was listen to a song that really really meaningful to me:)
It brings back the memories that i had before.=)
''i miss you like crazy'' the time.
my mind is thinking of you,darling.
Since we had the big quarrel few days and nights ago.
i realized that how important you are in my life.
i totally lost without you with me.
I miss you like crazy
even more than a word can say
i miss you like crazy
every minute of everyday
darling,i'm so down when your loves not around.
i miss you..i miss you..
i miss like crazy:)
do you know that..
you're all that i want,
you're all that i need,
can't you see what i feel?
can't you see that my pain is so real?
when i think of you,
i don't know what to do.
how i wish to see you right now:)
Just now received your msg.
said that you miss me so much.
haha..really happy and touch.
because i don 't receive that kind of msg from you always.
But i know you really mean it.
me too=)
I miss you like crazy.
Darling..I'm so sorry for always make you worry about me.
Thanks for become so mindful that night.
*only you can understand it*
Thanks for not leaving the hse even when we're in quarrel.
Glad that we overcome it!
Thanks to styler and davide.
*you both know what i mean*

Thursday, January 07, 2010

Sorry from me,to you:)

Really sorry for everything that i've done.
I guess now you realized that i'm not as good as you think right?
yea..i'm not that good and nice.
even i've tried to be the best for you.
but just don't know why i can't make you feel that.
so it shows that i'm failed.
Nothing more i can say.
just sorry^^
You never make me i cry for myself.
being so useless for you.
sorry for always making you worry about me.
sorry for always trouble you.
everything is my my bad.
i should stand for all these thing now.
i'm okay.
really sorry.
very sorry darling.
this time,i really don't know whether i should give up or not.
i'm doubting.
because sometime i do feel tired to face all these failure again and again.
i'll give you some time and i do need it too.
sorry for my weird attitude for this few days.
and i just don't know why.
i'll okay soon=)
love forever:)
only you.:)

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

I'm Not Going To Give Up=)

Since last night we had become like this.
I thought the morning after,we will okay.
but not at all.
not even a nice word to be said.
I'm used to be like a statue.>.<
the feeling of tired already a normal feel=)
just now few of them asked me about us.
I don't even know how to answer them.
feel so tired today.
the heart still feel the pain.This few nights suddenly awake then hardly to sleep back.
Is that the effect of taking the pills?
what mom told me,is that true??
hope no..but no matter how.i'll still eat it=)
won't give up so soon.

Tuesday, January 05, 2010


What's wrong??
why everything get so slow??
facebook,blog..all la..
to send a friend request also have to wait so long.
my pet society already load for two days..
still cannot!!
is my computer sick?or the connection cacat??
really pissed me off!!
darling still gaming.facebook have to wait half a year only can on.
don't treat me like this laa..
already stress enough!!

Monday, January 04, 2010


Feel glad and relax after all the assignments and presentations over.
now putting attention on the final coming soon.
going back this week.
Just now i bought the pill dy.
although it cost me alot.but i feel it's worth:)
hopefully nothing going to fall on me.
emo darling this few days.
cuz he keep playing games,don't want me.
but is okay least he still at home.
feeling closer and closer with kitty and yy.
kitty is cute! yy is cool!
nice friend to get along^^
brownie only eat veges and fruits.hahaha!
no more his food.
they always say i'm ugly..always that m**** is the most pretty one!
kenny,keong and even darling just the same!!!
I'm going to change their mind=)
darling,you wait and see!!
hng!! even though it will cost me a lot and harm my life.
i'll still carry it on=)
miss last night cycling to westlake with them..styler,kitty,yy and also burger.! and yum cha after that with kenny,monica and keong~~
really a fun time with them!
see...darling continue playing game there.
don't want bother him dy!

Saturday, January 02, 2010

Sad me:(

This few days darling keep busying with the games and comics.
makes me alone doing my own things.
that sometime make me feel very bored and annoying~~
sad me:(
well,all the presentations and assignments done.
totally done!
let's merdeka.
christmas and new year' countdown just over.
not really into it.
but still enjoy my time spent with darling and friends.
this few days darling so cool too.
sometime makes me scare of him
he don't talk much with me.
sad me=(
glad i still have brownie with me.
even though he can't answer me back,but still feel glad=)

Unlucky Doggies..Mandy:)

Just now when we on the our way for lunch,
saw a poor little puppy.
i guess she are starving and thirsty.
poor little puppy.:(
how i wish i have extra time to buy some food for her just now.
where is her mommy??
or others little siblings??
I hope can see her again.
and i'll feed her.
her name is 'mandy'
if her body no infection and the fur are nice.
i guess sure many kind people will take her as a pet.
Just now back from dinner,
saw another mandy.
big mandy.
but i'm not really sure whether its male or female la..
but i saw her/him finding food from the rubbish bin.
when i walk to home,
the dog follow us.
what a pity.
now realized that how lucky is my figo, crystal and queenie.
what a nice foods we feed them
poor little mandy and big mandy~~
don't know why feel sad to see them like that.
even though nothing concern with me.
let's pray for the doggies's life.

Friday, January 01, 2010

WeirD pe0ple

many weirD pe0ple appear in my life.
Really funny.
wonder how this kind of pe0ple can be in this whole wide world.
really there are many kind of species.
They can cheat people around them about the thing that never going to happen.
They can just do something that not a human should do.
They can just act like an actress won a best actress award.
They can just fa qiao even they're damn ugly.
They can just use people's name to cover own mistakes and will.
They can still close with people even they know themselve are not welcome.
They can break the promises that they made.
They can use others just for their own good.
And many many many more.
hate when my own close friend get into their trap.
and they simply couldn't see it.
really weird!!!! fuck off weird people.
How i wish to spell her name out.
nope.can't so bad de.
lol. know who i'm talking about laa..